Take a Long Walk off a Short Pier

I was a bit too young to fully understand what had just happened. All I remember is Duran’s dad hoping on top of the couch and jumping around in a frenzy while the house shook on its foundations. “We won! We Won!” he was shouting as he picked Duran and I up on his shoulders still with our lumo-lace up roller skates dangling from our chicken legs.

The Origin of Whodie

Please spell that for me sir: “W H O D I  E @ email.com” I would say. It normally is received by a long quiet pause… “Who Die? Sir?”  Back in the day I would correct her by pronouncing it: Hoo-dee but now I’m just like: “Yes… Who Die”.

Colts and Collisions

I have never thought that screwing insurance companies was the right thing to do. I understand that the reason they charge so much is because they get screwed so much. They must lose billions to fraudulent claims and so those billions are recovered from the customers. I always felt it wasn’t right – until I actually had to deal with one of them.

Ballito Boxing

Shame. I didn’t mean for that to go that well. All I wanted was for that young knob shiner to learn an important lesson. A lesson in accounting. Cause and effect.  A lesson that will serve him well as a business man later on in his life: “Don’t let your mouth write cheques that your body can’t cash”

Comrades 2015

He is running. “This is great” he thinks to himself, “I want to run the comrades when I’m older. I am only 10yrs old now but I will run the comrades some day!”.  With a big smile on his face and the fresh morning air filling his lungs he is running at full stride alongside the famous Comrades route. Giggling and skipping alongside the road and then BOOM! That poor little bugger – Barbara threw the bus door open with imperfect timing and that poor, happy, little bugger ran full tilt into 5 tons of solid bus door. He lay there, silent, wrenching in pain. We canned ourselves laughing…. Poor form….